Wednesday, November 29, 2006
The Golden Spurtle
November 29th. 21.55
This is of course a food orientated blog, even though it may not seem like it at times. The other day, a girl in Brighton mentioned porridge and although I see porridge almost every day at work, it hadn't crossed my mind to eat any until that moment. I therefore bought some Scott's oats which still has the kilted shot putter on the box and for some reason it reminds me of ads from the fifties. Strangely it also has porage not porridge. This may be a very healthy food but I believe it is best eaten with golden syrup and cream, so it does not turn out to be an ideal food for the serious diet. I was surprised that Google threw up, if that's the right phrase, 3,010,000 results when I typed in Porridge.( in 0.13 secs.). You may not be aware that 'The Golden Spurtle' was awarded to the recent winner of the World Porridge Making Championships held in Invernessshire. A spurtle is usually a wooden instrument shaped like a thistle for stirring the oats while they are cooking without scratching the pan, so a golden spurtle would seem to be rather counter productive. Personally, I use a wooden spoon.
Google amazes me. Why do they mention how many hundredths of a second it takes to find its results? At random I typed in a few other things just to see how many results it came up with and how long it took. 'Unbelievable' produced about 25,ooo,ooo results in 0.19 secs. 'Ratcatchers' produced 18,900 results in0.2 secs.. 'Cornish pasties' 332,000 in 0.15 secs. 'Roofing materials'
1,940,ooo results in0.21 secs, though when I looked through them it got bored after about eight hundred and seventy and told me it had edited out entries which seemed repetitive but could produce them if I wanted! 'Spurtle' got 32,900 results!
I had actually also looked up 'chestnuts' and was alarmed to find an article on the threat to Britain's horse chetnut trees. The trees at Kew have been weakened by drought and attacked by the leaf miner moth and by bleeding canker whichspreads around the trunk or branches until the limbs fall off or the tree falls over. The trees where I live seem very healthy and produced a reasonable crop of conkers but I haven't checked the trunks. I think they are more at risk from the developers who want to cut them down. I must check that a preservation order is slapped on them though that won't protect them from the leaf miner moth. Until trees are cut down one doesn't realise what an important part they play in the appearance of this "green and pleasant land" so today I offer ten of my favourite native trees ( so the chestnut doesn't get included I'm afraid):-
91. Ash
92. Beech
93. Common Oak
94. Hawthorn
95. Hazel
96. Holly
97. Rowan
98. Scots Pine
99. Silver Birch
100. Yew
I did come across a method of cooking the best roast chestnuts through the Google results but it is seriously flawed because the chestnut is cut in half and then cooked under a grill with the cut surface facing down. Surely the roast chestnut should be whole and when adequately cooked will be easily removed from its wrapping? Furthermore, I haven't got a grill! Today's menu included ten roast chestnuts (cooked in the oven), a slab of Gruyere, half a cold chicken and two tomatoes. Weight loss-nil; weight gain - nil. An honourable draw I feel.
This is of course a food orientated blog, even though it may not seem like it at times. The other day, a girl in Brighton mentioned porridge and although I see porridge almost every day at work, it hadn't crossed my mind to eat any until that moment. I therefore bought some Scott's oats which still has the kilted shot putter on the box and for some reason it reminds me of ads from the fifties. Strangely it also has porage not porridge. This may be a very healthy food but I believe it is best eaten with golden syrup and cream, so it does not turn out to be an ideal food for the serious diet. I was surprised that Google threw up, if that's the right phrase, 3,010,000 results when I typed in Porridge.( in 0.13 secs.). You may not be aware that 'The Golden Spurtle' was awarded to the recent winner of the World Porridge Making Championships held in Invernessshire. A spurtle is usually a wooden instrument shaped like a thistle for stirring the oats while they are cooking without scratching the pan, so a golden spurtle would seem to be rather counter productive. Personally, I use a wooden spoon.
Google amazes me. Why do they mention how many hundredths of a second it takes to find its results? At random I typed in a few other things just to see how many results it came up with and how long it took. 'Unbelievable' produced about 25,ooo,ooo results in 0.19 secs. 'Ratcatchers' produced 18,900 results in0.2 secs.. 'Cornish pasties' 332,000 in 0.15 secs. 'Roofing materials'
1,940,ooo results in0.21 secs, though when I looked through them it got bored after about eight hundred and seventy and told me it had edited out entries which seemed repetitive but could produce them if I wanted! 'Spurtle' got 32,900 results!
I had actually also looked up 'chestnuts' and was alarmed to find an article on the threat to Britain's horse chetnut trees. The trees at Kew have been weakened by drought and attacked by the leaf miner moth and by bleeding canker whichspreads around the trunk or branches until the limbs fall off or the tree falls over. The trees where I live seem very healthy and produced a reasonable crop of conkers but I haven't checked the trunks. I think they are more at risk from the developers who want to cut them down. I must check that a preservation order is slapped on them though that won't protect them from the leaf miner moth. Until trees are cut down one doesn't realise what an important part they play in the appearance of this "green and pleasant land" so today I offer ten of my favourite native trees ( so the chestnut doesn't get included I'm afraid):-
91. Ash
92. Beech
93. Common Oak
94. Hawthorn
95. Hazel
96. Holly
97. Rowan
98. Scots Pine
99. Silver Birch
100. Yew
I did come across a method of cooking the best roast chestnuts through the Google results but it is seriously flawed because the chestnut is cut in half and then cooked under a grill with the cut surface facing down. Surely the roast chestnut should be whole and when adequately cooked will be easily removed from its wrapping? Furthermore, I haven't got a grill! Today's menu included ten roast chestnuts (cooked in the oven), a slab of Gruyere, half a cold chicken and two tomatoes. Weight loss-nil; weight gain - nil. An honourable draw I feel.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
What's for afters?
November 28th. 21.35
Nice try, gardener, but I'm afraid that crepes with spinach and ricotta won't qualify. There's just too much other stuff in that dish to allow it as a cheese course or meal. Of course Brunetti is one of this blogger's favourites as food is a major aspect of his life. If only his wife weren't such a smart arse with attitude. Still, she seems to be a reasonable cook. Incidentally, we do not know who gardener might be but we welcome comments from Brunetti readers.
I think we must close the discussion on whether cheeses such as Stilton or Dolcelatta contain blue or green (its blue actually) and some grapes do seem to be quite blue. There is a plum called Kirkes Blue and another called Bullace which is quite blue.
Talk of pancakes makes me realise that 'Puddings' are sadly neglected in detective fiction except with Brunetti. I always used to think that a meal should have at least two courses. The pudding in school dinners was an absolute essential at a time when one was always hungry and could never get big enough portions. I would even eat the 'jam tart pudding with custard' which was always ruined by a light sprinkling of dried coconut flakes which, apart from their unpleasant taste, left one with that odd feeling in ones mouth for which there is no proper descriptive noun, but is of an odd dryness that slows down the swallowing process which is barely overcome with lashings of rather watery school custard. Ever since that time I have made the avoidance of coconut one of the cardinal rules about puddings.
Another of my rules for puddings is to avoid things that have been made by first melting down bars of chocolate and then adding pints of double cream and egg whites in a vain attempt to make the dish less sickly. This seldom works and I usually regret eating those dishes and will not prepare them. Of course most puddings- or sweets as they are of course known- usually contain a fair amount of sugar and/or pastry or sponge and are not at all suitable for the serious dieter.
A third rule is to avoid adding nuts to the dish as they always seem to add a dryness that is unwelcome and sometimes a feeling that something has fallen into the dish during preparation that wasn't supposed to be there. Nuts are fine as a snack but not as a pudding. I don't really count fruit on its own as a pudding which must require more effort than holding it under a tap.However fruit plays a major part in most of my favourite puddings and in today's selection apples and plums are often interchangeable and sometimes should be mixed:-
81. Rice Pudding (see recipe in a previous blog)
82. Plum Pie with custard ( thick skin on custard essential)
83. Plum/Apple Crumble with cream AND custard
84. Apple tart (hot) with Vanilla icecream
85. Apple Strudel
86. Lemon Meringue Pie
87. Creme Brulee
88. Bread and Butter Pudding
89. Queen of Puddings
90. Raspberry Cheesecake
It often adds to the quality of a crumble to use several different varieties of apple to obtain different and interesting textures and sometimes I add pears if available and dried peach. I am very fond of pancakes both sweet and savoury but they missed selection by a whisker.
Today I ate all I could of the stew which was not improved by the addition of the allotment rat and consigned the rest of it to the bin mainly because I was bored with it. Stews without mashed potatoes or baked potatoes to mop up the gravy don't seem quite right.
Although I no longer like Frank Keating's articles in the Guardian ( he's become just a bit too matey with sporting celebrities) he may have put his finger on England's lack of rugby success when he details the meals eaten by the English threequarter Noon. For breakfast on the match day he ate " Fruit and Fibre, poached eggs, beans on toast, protein shake, juice, yogurt, fruit and green tea." for lunch, only three hours after breakfast and three hours before kick-off, he ate "Pasta, toast, eggs, beans, jacket potatoes, boiled chicken and yogurt." I am sorry that I just cannot believe that such a diet is likely to lead to any zip or sparkle on the pitch. I am amazed that all the sporting boffins and advisors have fallen for that sort of dietary advice. I think I should be be brought in as advisor or possibly even the next coach.
Nice try, gardener, but I'm afraid that crepes with spinach and ricotta won't qualify. There's just too much other stuff in that dish to allow it as a cheese course or meal. Of course Brunetti is one of this blogger's favourites as food is a major aspect of his life. If only his wife weren't such a smart arse with attitude. Still, she seems to be a reasonable cook. Incidentally, we do not know who gardener might be but we welcome comments from Brunetti readers.
I think we must close the discussion on whether cheeses such as Stilton or Dolcelatta contain blue or green (its blue actually) and some grapes do seem to be quite blue. There is a plum called Kirkes Blue and another called Bullace which is quite blue.
Talk of pancakes makes me realise that 'Puddings' are sadly neglected in detective fiction except with Brunetti. I always used to think that a meal should have at least two courses. The pudding in school dinners was an absolute essential at a time when one was always hungry and could never get big enough portions. I would even eat the 'jam tart pudding with custard' which was always ruined by a light sprinkling of dried coconut flakes which, apart from their unpleasant taste, left one with that odd feeling in ones mouth for which there is no proper descriptive noun, but is of an odd dryness that slows down the swallowing process which is barely overcome with lashings of rather watery school custard. Ever since that time I have made the avoidance of coconut one of the cardinal rules about puddings.
Another of my rules for puddings is to avoid things that have been made by first melting down bars of chocolate and then adding pints of double cream and egg whites in a vain attempt to make the dish less sickly. This seldom works and I usually regret eating those dishes and will not prepare them. Of course most puddings- or sweets as they are of course known- usually contain a fair amount of sugar and/or pastry or sponge and are not at all suitable for the serious dieter.
A third rule is to avoid adding nuts to the dish as they always seem to add a dryness that is unwelcome and sometimes a feeling that something has fallen into the dish during preparation that wasn't supposed to be there. Nuts are fine as a snack but not as a pudding. I don't really count fruit on its own as a pudding which must require more effort than holding it under a tap.However fruit plays a major part in most of my favourite puddings and in today's selection apples and plums are often interchangeable and sometimes should be mixed:-
81. Rice Pudding (see recipe in a previous blog)
82. Plum Pie with custard ( thick skin on custard essential)
83. Plum/Apple Crumble with cream AND custard
84. Apple tart (hot) with Vanilla icecream
85. Apple Strudel
86. Lemon Meringue Pie
87. Creme Brulee
88. Bread and Butter Pudding
89. Queen of Puddings
90. Raspberry Cheesecake
It often adds to the quality of a crumble to use several different varieties of apple to obtain different and interesting textures and sometimes I add pears if available and dried peach. I am very fond of pancakes both sweet and savoury but they missed selection by a whisker.
Today I ate all I could of the stew which was not improved by the addition of the allotment rat and consigned the rest of it to the bin mainly because I was bored with it. Stews without mashed potatoes or baked potatoes to mop up the gravy don't seem quite right.
Although I no longer like Frank Keating's articles in the Guardian ( he's become just a bit too matey with sporting celebrities) he may have put his finger on England's lack of rugby success when he details the meals eaten by the English threequarter Noon. For breakfast on the match day he ate " Fruit and Fibre, poached eggs, beans on toast, protein shake, juice, yogurt, fruit and green tea." for lunch, only three hours after breakfast and three hours before kick-off, he ate "Pasta, toast, eggs, beans, jacket potatoes, boiled chicken and yogurt." I am sorry that I just cannot believe that such a diet is likely to lead to any zip or sparkle on the pitch. I am amazed that all the sporting boffins and advisors have fallen for that sort of dietary advice. I think I should be be brought in as advisor or possibly even the next coach.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Blue Moon
November 27th. 12.45
Yes, the story of Mr Rabbit and the Lovely Present is a real gripper and I agree about the business of stars being blue. Grapes, certainly, but never stars. Still, I expect the author was struggling to find something blue on that scale that was unattainable. I have a feeling that the Mafia have planted blue grapes on the allotment but strangely have not seen them for several weeks which may be due to the weather or knee replacement surgery. I don't suppose that it has been any wetter here than in most other parts over the weekend but it has certainly not been good allotment weather. Furthermore being on call for Friday night and working Saturday made me feel that the rest of the weekend should be spent in the warm, watching British teams taking their beating like men. The only faintly acceptable result was the Swan's 0-0 draw with Bristol City.I am told by blondes who were at that game that there were plenty of seats available for that match whereas it had been announced that the game was a sell out- a further reason not to listen to Leighton James as if there weren't enough already. Being at home by daylight for a change made me realise just how the garden has been neglected in favour of the allotment, so I was shamed into spending several hours clearing up leaves and pruning.
The Fairy Gunmother was not a good book as it took far too long to understand the way it jumped about and was extremely difficult to get into. No meals at all were consumed though there was plenty of drink and drugs. In the end it was quite amusing but don't go out of your way to find it. The Prone Gunman on the other hand was a book well worth going a long way to avoid even though he does eat a couple of rather un-inspiring meals. Random violence and murder occur throughout this short unpleasant book and there is no way one can develop any sympathy or liking for any of the characters. I am glad to be back in familiar territory, namely Cuba, with Padura's Havana Black where the food eaten, though it doesn't sound too exciting (rice, beans, chicken) at least sounds tasty and is eaten with great enjoyment. I expect that better meals are to come.
The more I think about it, the more I realise that no detective fiction so far has ever descibed a meal containg cheese. So to fill that gap, I offer ten of my favourites:-
71. Boursin
72. Brie
73. Cambazola
74. Camembert
75. Cheddar
76. Dolcelatte
77. Gruyere
78. Jarlsberg.
79. Port Salut
80. Stilton
Notice that they are all made with cow's milk. I had thought of including Chaumes (goat) and Roquefort (ewe) but realised that they do not play an important enough role in my life to be selected.Note also that only two of them contain any blue. I'm sure that Blue Moon was the title of a very popular song at one time. Obviously people are not put off by getting all the facts wrong.
Yes, the story of Mr Rabbit and the Lovely Present is a real gripper and I agree about the business of stars being blue. Grapes, certainly, but never stars. Still, I expect the author was struggling to find something blue on that scale that was unattainable. I have a feeling that the Mafia have planted blue grapes on the allotment but strangely have not seen them for several weeks which may be due to the weather or knee replacement surgery. I don't suppose that it has been any wetter here than in most other parts over the weekend but it has certainly not been good allotment weather. Furthermore being on call for Friday night and working Saturday made me feel that the rest of the weekend should be spent in the warm, watching British teams taking their beating like men. The only faintly acceptable result was the Swan's 0-0 draw with Bristol City.I am told by blondes who were at that game that there were plenty of seats available for that match whereas it had been announced that the game was a sell out- a further reason not to listen to Leighton James as if there weren't enough already. Being at home by daylight for a change made me realise just how the garden has been neglected in favour of the allotment, so I was shamed into spending several hours clearing up leaves and pruning.
The Fairy Gunmother was not a good book as it took far too long to understand the way it jumped about and was extremely difficult to get into. No meals at all were consumed though there was plenty of drink and drugs. In the end it was quite amusing but don't go out of your way to find it. The Prone Gunman on the other hand was a book well worth going a long way to avoid even though he does eat a couple of rather un-inspiring meals. Random violence and murder occur throughout this short unpleasant book and there is no way one can develop any sympathy or liking for any of the characters. I am glad to be back in familiar territory, namely Cuba, with Padura's Havana Black where the food eaten, though it doesn't sound too exciting (rice, beans, chicken) at least sounds tasty and is eaten with great enjoyment. I expect that better meals are to come.
The more I think about it, the more I realise that no detective fiction so far has ever descibed a meal containg cheese. So to fill that gap, I offer ten of my favourites:-
71. Boursin
72. Brie
73. Cambazola
74. Camembert
75. Cheddar
76. Dolcelatte
77. Gruyere
78. Jarlsberg.
79. Port Salut
80. Stilton
Notice that they are all made with cow's milk. I had thought of including Chaumes (goat) and Roquefort (ewe) but realised that they do not play an important enough role in my life to be selected.Note also that only two of them contain any blue. I'm sure that Blue Moon was the title of a very popular song at one time. Obviously people are not put off by getting all the facts wrong.
Friday, November 24, 2006
Nuts
November 24th. 12.09
The Blues Bothers might get on a future list. In fact they are rather unlucky not to have been voted on to either the colour list or the films. I'm more surprised that none of the Marx Brothers' films weren't selected. Perhaps the jury will pick them in future.I am sorry to have to report that I cannot allow myself to be influenced by unsolicited plugs from members of the public, nor can I adjudicate on which is the best f and c shop in Britain. I suspect that the method of cooking is much the same in all the shops, but the perfection of the final product depends on the freshness of the fish, the type of fat used and the care given to the duration of cooking the chips and their drainage. The newspaper used for their wrapping ( as Nancy Banks Smith noted a propos of Bluenthal's progamme) is all important and should contain at least one unlikely tale of female gullibility and one story of man's greed or dishonesty. Gardening news just wont do. Ideally the article should be tantalisingly incomplete.
It is obviously not a mere coincidence that both the Guardian and Terry Wogan today both allude to subjects already adequately covered in this blog. Simon Jenkins manages almost a full page article on the Olympics and in fact says more or less what I put in less than a paragraph the other day. Of course he's paid by the word whereas this is strictly amateur and therefore more succinct. Terry Wogan referred to the England team in Australia 'taking their beating like a man'. Clearly both the Guardian staff and Wogan are reading the blog but haven't yet declared that they do so. Remember, you read it here first!
Now what follows is a rather wordy list of my favourite utterings of Sam Goldwyn:-
61. "Gentlemen, include me out."
62. "Our comedies are not to be laughed at"
63. "I read part of it all the way through."
64. "You fail to overlook the crucial point."
65. "Can she sing? She's pracically Florence Nightingale."
66. "They stayed away in droves."
67. "Let's have some new cliches."
68. "It's absolutely impossible, but it has possibilities."
69. "Tell them to stand closer apart."
70. "Gentlemen, listen to me slowly."
There are of course lots of others that might have been included by a different jury. I was approached today by someone who must remain nameless who blatantly suggested she should appear in a list. I'm not sure whether I will have a list for dumb blondes , or possibly natural blondes or even un-natural blondes at some time in the future but I will not accept bribes or favours to get listed. This is a sleaze free zone but I could meet you ( you know who ) by the bike sheds at five.
Owing to a sudden mental aberration- I think I was carried away by the thought of what might happen with all those bicycles, I pressed the 'publish' button by mistake, having forgotten both the title and the main subject, namely my dieat. You might have guessed that nuts would appear. There is no doubt that the roasted, salted pistachios are my favourites though now that I have mastered the roasting times for chestnuts I may have a seasonal break from pistachios. I have been wondering why the hazelnuts have such tough shells and the kitchen has a number of broken shells scattered on the floor as a result of the rather explosive way they suddenly yield to the nut cracker. Talking of nut crackers.....
The Blues Bothers might get on a future list. In fact they are rather unlucky not to have been voted on to either the colour list or the films. I'm more surprised that none of the Marx Brothers' films weren't selected. Perhaps the jury will pick them in future.I am sorry to have to report that I cannot allow myself to be influenced by unsolicited plugs from members of the public, nor can I adjudicate on which is the best f and c shop in Britain. I suspect that the method of cooking is much the same in all the shops, but the perfection of the final product depends on the freshness of the fish, the type of fat used and the care given to the duration of cooking the chips and their drainage. The newspaper used for their wrapping ( as Nancy Banks Smith noted a propos of Bluenthal's progamme) is all important and should contain at least one unlikely tale of female gullibility and one story of man's greed or dishonesty. Gardening news just wont do. Ideally the article should be tantalisingly incomplete.
It is obviously not a mere coincidence that both the Guardian and Terry Wogan today both allude to subjects already adequately covered in this blog. Simon Jenkins manages almost a full page article on the Olympics and in fact says more or less what I put in less than a paragraph the other day. Of course he's paid by the word whereas this is strictly amateur and therefore more succinct. Terry Wogan referred to the England team in Australia 'taking their beating like a man'. Clearly both the Guardian staff and Wogan are reading the blog but haven't yet declared that they do so. Remember, you read it here first!
Now what follows is a rather wordy list of my favourite utterings of Sam Goldwyn:-
61. "Gentlemen, include me out."
62. "Our comedies are not to be laughed at"
63. "I read part of it all the way through."
64. "You fail to overlook the crucial point."
65. "Can she sing? She's pracically Florence Nightingale."
66. "They stayed away in droves."
67. "Let's have some new cliches."
68. "It's absolutely impossible, but it has possibilities."
69. "Tell them to stand closer apart."
70. "Gentlemen, listen to me slowly."
There are of course lots of others that might have been included by a different jury. I was approached today by someone who must remain nameless who blatantly suggested she should appear in a list. I'm not sure whether I will have a list for dumb blondes , or possibly natural blondes or even un-natural blondes at some time in the future but I will not accept bribes or favours to get listed. This is a sleaze free zone but I could meet you ( you know who ) by the bike sheds at five.
Owing to a sudden mental aberration- I think I was carried away by the thought of what might happen with all those bicycles, I pressed the 'publish' button by mistake, having forgotten both the title and the main subject, namely my dieat. You might have guessed that nuts would appear. There is no doubt that the roasted, salted pistachios are my favourites though now that I have mastered the roasting times for chestnuts I may have a seasonal break from pistachios. I have been wondering why the hazelnuts have such tough shells and the kitchen has a number of broken shells scattered on the floor as a result of the rather explosive way they suddenly yield to the nut cracker. Talking of nut crackers.....
November 24th. 12.09
The Blues Bothers might get on a future list. In fact they are rather unlucky not to have been voted on to either the colour list or the films. I'm more surprised that none of the Marx Brothers' films weren't selected. Perhaps the jury will pick them in future.I am sorry to have to report that I cannot allow myself to be influenced by unsolicited plugs from members of the public, nor can I adjudicate on which is the best f and c shop in Britain. I suspect that the method of cooking is much the same in all the shops, but the perfection of the final product depends on the freshness of the fish, the type of fat used and the care given to the duration of cooking the chips and their drainage. The newspaper used for their wrapping ( as Nancy Banks Smith noted a propos of Bluenthal's progamme) is all important and should contain at least one unlikely tale of female gullibility and one story of man's greed or dishonesty. Gardening news just wont do. Ideally the article should be tantalisingly incomplete.
It is obviously not a mere coincidence that both the Guardian and Terry Wogan today both allude to subjects already adequately covered in this blog. Simon Jenkins manages almost a full page article on the Olympics and in fact says more or less what I put in less than a paragraph the other day. Of course he's paid by the word whereas this is strictly amateur and therefore more succinct. Terry Wogan referred to the England team in Australia 'taking their beating like a man'. Clearly both the Guardian staff and Wogan are reading the blog but haven't yet declared that they do so. Remember, you read it here first!
Now what follows is a rather wordy list of my favourite utterings of Sam Goldwyn:-
61. "Gentlemen, include me out."
62. "Our comedies are not to be laughed at"
63. "I read part of it all the way through."
64. "You fail to overlook the crucial point."
65. "Can she sing? She's pracically Florence Nightingale."
66. "They stayed away in droves."
67. "Let's have some new cliches."
68. "It's absolutely impossible, but it has possibilities."
69. "Tell them to stand closer apart."
70. "Gentlemen, listen to me slowly."
There are of course lots of others that might have been included by a different jury. I was approached today by someone who must remain nameless who blatantly suggested she should appear in a list. I'm not sure whether I will have a list for dumb blondes , or possibly natural blondes or even un-natural blondes at some time in the future but I will not accept bribes or favours to get listed. This is a sleaze free zone but I could meet you ( you know who ) by the bike sheds at five.
The Blues Bothers might get on a future list. In fact they are rather unlucky not to have been voted on to either the colour list or the films. I'm more surprised that none of the Marx Brothers' films weren't selected. Perhaps the jury will pick them in future.I am sorry to have to report that I cannot allow myself to be influenced by unsolicited plugs from members of the public, nor can I adjudicate on which is the best f and c shop in Britain. I suspect that the method of cooking is much the same in all the shops, but the perfection of the final product depends on the freshness of the fish, the type of fat used and the care given to the duration of cooking the chips and their drainage. The newspaper used for their wrapping ( as Nancy Banks Smith noted a propos of Bluenthal's progamme) is all important and should contain at least one unlikely tale of female gullibility and one story of man's greed or dishonesty. Gardening news just wont do. Ideally the article should be tantalisingly incomplete.
It is obviously not a mere coincidence that both the Guardian and Terry Wogan today both allude to subjects already adequately covered in this blog. Simon Jenkins manages almost a full page article on the Olympics and in fact says more or less what I put in less than a paragraph the other day. Of course he's paid by the word whereas this is strictly amateur and therefore more succinct. Terry Wogan referred to the England team in Australia 'taking their beating like a man'. Clearly both the Guardian staff and Wogan are reading the blog but haven't yet declared that they do so. Remember, you read it here first!
Now what follows is a rather wordy list of my favourite utterings of Sam Goldwyn:-
61. "Gentlemen, include me out."
62. "Our comedies are not to be laughed at"
63. "I read part of it all the way through."
64. "You fail to overlook the crucial point."
65. "Can she sing? She's pracically Florence Nightingale."
66. "They stayed away in droves."
67. "Let's have some new cliches."
68. "It's absolutely impossible, but it has possibilities."
69. "Tell them to stand closer apart."
70. "Gentlemen, listen to me slowly."
There are of course lots of others that might have been included by a different jury. I was approached today by someone who must remain nameless who blatantly suggested she should appear in a list. I'm not sure whether I will have a list for dumb blondes , or possibly natural blondes or even un-natural blondes at some time in the future but I will not accept bribes or favours to get listed. This is a sleaze free zone but I could meet you ( you know who ) by the bike sheds at five.
Thursday, November 23, 2006
Wrong number
November 23rd. 08.41
I am hoping that advances in stem cell research will be in time to save my memory. Yes, apologies to Kevandjules about failure to answer the Pink problem that was troubling them and about the F and C joke and about Beige-ing and Damon Runyon. I also forgot that yesterday was weigh day and by the time I remembered all these things it was already today and I went to bed too.
I seem to remember reading a children's story about a little girl and a lovely present. She is asked what she likes and always replies with a particular colour, such as 'green'. 'Green! You can't have green' replies Mr Rabbit, who is the hero of this exciting tale. 'Something green, maybe' replies the little girl. I don't want to spoil the story for you by letting you have the denouement in case you are about to get this book for Christmas, but the point is, you can't just have a colour. So pink is Pink as in 'I'm Not Dead'.
The F and C joke has to be spoken not written or it will lose everything funny and I will relay it to anyone when I speak to them if requested. It is remarkable because it is the first joke told by the Food Police that ever made me - or anyone else- laugh.
Damon Runyon got in a second time by mistake though I make no apolodgies. There are certain rules but I'm likely to change them at a moment's notice. Beige-ing didn't get in to the list for two reasons. It is too weak a pun and I have never been there. The list reflect some sort of impact on my life and Beijinghas made none so far.
Spelling mistakes will creep in from time to time, usually as a result of typing technique rather than ignorance. My memory is at fault for putting the wrong numbers on the last list, so there were two lots of thirty somethings. Today we will therefore start at fifty one:-
51. Casablanca
52. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
53. The Wages of Fear
54. Bugsy Malone
55. Some Like It Hot
56. The Sting
57. The African Queen
58. The Magnificent Seven (yes. yes. I know)
59. Midnight Run
60. Sea of Love
There is always a time difference of about eight hours. I did think this was Standard Eastern Time but it might be further west. I'm hoping to be cloned soon so there will be more blogs from both of me.
I am hoping that advances in stem cell research will be in time to save my memory. Yes, apologies to Kevandjules about failure to answer the Pink problem that was troubling them and about the F and C joke and about Beige-ing and Damon Runyon. I also forgot that yesterday was weigh day and by the time I remembered all these things it was already today and I went to bed too.
I seem to remember reading a children's story about a little girl and a lovely present. She is asked what she likes and always replies with a particular colour, such as 'green'. 'Green! You can't have green' replies Mr Rabbit, who is the hero of this exciting tale. 'Something green, maybe' replies the little girl. I don't want to spoil the story for you by letting you have the denouement in case you are about to get this book for Christmas, but the point is, you can't just have a colour. So pink is Pink as in 'I'm Not Dead'.
The F and C joke has to be spoken not written or it will lose everything funny and I will relay it to anyone when I speak to them if requested. It is remarkable because it is the first joke told by the Food Police that ever made me - or anyone else- laugh.
Damon Runyon got in a second time by mistake though I make no apolodgies. There are certain rules but I'm likely to change them at a moment's notice. Beige-ing didn't get in to the list for two reasons. It is too weak a pun and I have never been there. The list reflect some sort of impact on my life and Beijinghas made none so far.
Spelling mistakes will creep in from time to time, usually as a result of typing technique rather than ignorance. My memory is at fault for putting the wrong numbers on the last list, so there were two lots of thirty somethings. Today we will therefore start at fifty one:-
51. Casablanca
52. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
53. The Wages of Fear
54. Bugsy Malone
55. Some Like It Hot
56. The Sting
57. The African Queen
58. The Magnificent Seven (yes. yes. I know)
59. Midnight Run
60. Sea of Love
There is always a time difference of about eight hours. I did think this was Standard Eastern Time but it might be further west. I'm hoping to be cloned soon so there will be more blogs from both of me.
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Dangerous food
November 22nd. 22.48
In one hour and twelve minutes the first test in Australia will be underway. The series last year was very special, really exciting and some of the matches were really very close and could easily have finished with a different result. Even non-cricket lovers could appreciate the contest.The English do care about the result but I like to think we can take defeat in sport in our stride; we are quite used to it. I think we accept it rather better than many sporting nations. One sporting event we really don't care about is the Olympics. Its no use pretending that we do. Who can remember the names of the Brits who won gold medals at the last bash except the ones who have become TV pundits? I am really sorry that London was awarded the 2012 Olympics. It will cost squillions to stage. It will cost millions to produce one or two gold medallists who will be forgotten within a couple of years. We don't care enough about winning. Most of the sports included in the games are not watchable ( beach volleyball, greco-roman wrestling, the marathon, shooting, archery, ping-pong etc. etc). Only the relatives or friends of the athletes go to most athletics meetings except for major championships, revealing a basic lack of interest in the sport. The games will take place in the wrong city. They will not be accessable to most of the population outside London. We are in for some of the most boring publicity in the press, on radio and television of all time. The few weeks before , during and after the Olympics will be a good time to leave the country.
I read that many allotments will be sacrificed to make way for the many Olympic facilities. I really do feel that the money that will be wasted on the whole venture which will make a few entrepreneurs very rich and will cost the tax payers a fortune should be used round the country to improve recreational facilities for the whole country.Furthermore, why are the costs already escalating? We always suspected that they would , but it doesn't give us a great confidence in the ability of the 'planners'.
An unlikely event ocurred yesterday. Woody, perhaps spurred on by guilt, went to the allotment. He forgot his keys to get into the site and his keys to to get into the shed to get his gardening clothes and spade, and his back was troubling him so he couldn't dig very deep, but he did turn up and stayed for a couple of hours. He forgot the garlic but thinks it will be planted later in the week! It was great to see him there and have a bit of banter.
Now , after an Olympic whinge, a list of writers to celebrate:-
31. James Thurber
32. S.J.Perelman
33. Damon Runyon
34. Peter de Vries
35. Joseph Heller
36. Philip Roth
37. E.L.Doctorow
38. Saul Bellow
39. John Updike
40. Ring Lardner
Cooking in the Aga is really fairly easy. You put things in and when you feel they should be ready, they usually are. But chestnuts are rather tricky and the top oven was splattered by an exploding chestnut tonight. I am experimenting with the timing as a few minutes too long in the oven renders them hard and dry and without enough holes punched in them, they obviously explode with a rather nice plopping sound but the mess is terrible.
One of the books in the latest delivery of possible gulp fiction has a comment written on the blurb that there is an 'Italian twist' to the story. I can't really imagine what a typically Italian twist might be- something like a Chinese burn maybe?
In one hour and twelve minutes the first test in Australia will be underway. The series last year was very special, really exciting and some of the matches were really very close and could easily have finished with a different result. Even non-cricket lovers could appreciate the contest.The English do care about the result but I like to think we can take defeat in sport in our stride; we are quite used to it. I think we accept it rather better than many sporting nations. One sporting event we really don't care about is the Olympics. Its no use pretending that we do. Who can remember the names of the Brits who won gold medals at the last bash except the ones who have become TV pundits? I am really sorry that London was awarded the 2012 Olympics. It will cost squillions to stage. It will cost millions to produce one or two gold medallists who will be forgotten within a couple of years. We don't care enough about winning. Most of the sports included in the games are not watchable ( beach volleyball, greco-roman wrestling, the marathon, shooting, archery, ping-pong etc. etc). Only the relatives or friends of the athletes go to most athletics meetings except for major championships, revealing a basic lack of interest in the sport. The games will take place in the wrong city. They will not be accessable to most of the population outside London. We are in for some of the most boring publicity in the press, on radio and television of all time. The few weeks before , during and after the Olympics will be a good time to leave the country.
I read that many allotments will be sacrificed to make way for the many Olympic facilities. I really do feel that the money that will be wasted on the whole venture which will make a few entrepreneurs very rich and will cost the tax payers a fortune should be used round the country to improve recreational facilities for the whole country.Furthermore, why are the costs already escalating? We always suspected that they would , but it doesn't give us a great confidence in the ability of the 'planners'.
An unlikely event ocurred yesterday. Woody, perhaps spurred on by guilt, went to the allotment. He forgot his keys to get into the site and his keys to to get into the shed to get his gardening clothes and spade, and his back was troubling him so he couldn't dig very deep, but he did turn up and stayed for a couple of hours. He forgot the garlic but thinks it will be planted later in the week! It was great to see him there and have a bit of banter.
Now , after an Olympic whinge, a list of writers to celebrate:-
31. James Thurber
32. S.J.Perelman
33. Damon Runyon
34. Peter de Vries
35. Joseph Heller
36. Philip Roth
37. E.L.Doctorow
38. Saul Bellow
39. John Updike
40. Ring Lardner
Cooking in the Aga is really fairly easy. You put things in and when you feel they should be ready, they usually are. But chestnuts are rather tricky and the top oven was splattered by an exploding chestnut tonight. I am experimenting with the timing as a few minutes too long in the oven renders them hard and dry and without enough holes punched in them, they obviously explode with a rather nice plopping sound but the mess is terrible.
One of the books in the latest delivery of possible gulp fiction has a comment written on the blurb that there is an 'Italian twist' to the story. I can't really imagine what a typically Italian twist might be- something like a Chinese burn maybe?
Monday, November 20, 2006
Prime Numbers
November 20th. 19.47
The food police are notorious for bad jokes but I was surprised by one about the fish and chips and the library. I actually laughed aloud. Beige-ing was quite clever but not really a classic was it? Furthermore it was quite unsuitable for a list because I've not been there so it might not be a place I like or admire.
The weather has not been good for gardeners though it did just what was forecast today; bright and sunny in the morning and showers in the afternoon. Sadly the weather was just too tough for Woody but I managed to do another two hours digging today before it became too dark and too wet to continue. I was watched for some of this time by an almost mute man who has a nearby allotment. When I dug up a fairly fresh rat he assured me in some strange language that there were hundreds of them about. The rat seemed fresh enough in a Baldrick way to add to the rather boring stew I made yesterday. Its odd how sometimes they just dont come out right. I suspect its the quality of the meat. Still, a bit of rat should add a bit of zest to it!
Now, what follows is a list, not a puzzle:-
31. 3.14159265358979932384......
32. 7 Samurai (or Magnificent 7)
33. 10 square perches (standard allotment size)
34. 39 Steps
35. 40 Winks
36. 42 (Douglas Adams)
37. 49ers
38. 221b
39. 1066
40. 1984
Its going to take some time to complete my survey of gulp fiction but when I do finish, I will produce a list of the top ten. I have been reading the Fairy Gunmother when I have had the energy but its not a gripper frankly and no serious food is consumed (junk fiction). I am moving next to The Prone Gunman. Lets hope he eats better than the fairy gunmother.
The food police are notorious for bad jokes but I was surprised by one about the fish and chips and the library. I actually laughed aloud. Beige-ing was quite clever but not really a classic was it? Furthermore it was quite unsuitable for a list because I've not been there so it might not be a place I like or admire.
The weather has not been good for gardeners though it did just what was forecast today; bright and sunny in the morning and showers in the afternoon. Sadly the weather was just too tough for Woody but I managed to do another two hours digging today before it became too dark and too wet to continue. I was watched for some of this time by an almost mute man who has a nearby allotment. When I dug up a fairly fresh rat he assured me in some strange language that there were hundreds of them about. The rat seemed fresh enough in a Baldrick way to add to the rather boring stew I made yesterday. Its odd how sometimes they just dont come out right. I suspect its the quality of the meat. Still, a bit of rat should add a bit of zest to it!
Now, what follows is a list, not a puzzle:-
31. 3.14159265358979932384......
32. 7 Samurai (or Magnificent 7)
33. 10 square perches (standard allotment size)
34. 39 Steps
35. 40 Winks
36. 42 (Douglas Adams)
37. 49ers
38. 221b
39. 1066
40. 1984
Its going to take some time to complete my survey of gulp fiction but when I do finish, I will produce a list of the top ten. I have been reading the Fairy Gunmother when I have had the energy but its not a gripper frankly and no serious food is consumed (junk fiction). I am moving next to The Prone Gunman. Lets hope he eats better than the fairy gunmother.
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Trooping the colours
November 19th.
I was surprised that stanandtel thought I had included a knighted sportsman in my lists. I think they're having nightmares about the prospect of Beckham being knighted. The whole honours system is deeply suspect and rather offensive to those who are equally deserving of recognition but overlooked. Recognition in my lists will one day be considered a far greater honour than a gong. In due course there will definitely be sportsmen but there will be a serious attempt to avoid those that think they are celebrities. A view was also expressed that there was a 'fat' chance that Bob would lose weight with the diet of foods mentioned so far, particularly the rice pudding. I must stress that the whole idea of this diet is that it should be a totally painless way of losing weight and it must not intrude on my social activities.
Today's intake has been a rather healthy sounding mixture of fish and beef stew with a few secret ingredients with some cheese and salami. Unfortunately the weather has been too unpleasant to do anything on the allotment. The sleeper awoke for long enough to have a game of squash but in spite of his youth and general fitness he wasn't tough enough to go to the allotment. He was thirsty enough however during and after Wales victory over Canada on Friday and I was reluctantly drawn into drinking more than was strictly necessary to quench my thirst. Last night the Food Police again forced me to repeat that indiscretion so I'm not too optimistic about major weight loss this week.
Now for those of you who don't like lists I offer:-
21. Blackadder (4th. series)
22. Blondie
23. Brown Eyed Girl (Morrison)
24. Blue Train (Coltrane)
25. Gray's Elegy Written in a Country Churchyard
26. Greene's 'Entertainments'
27. Clockwork Orange
28. Pink
29. Red Dwarf
30. Whiter Shade of Pale
The leaves that remain on the trees are particularly colourful at the moment but all the leaves from the Japanese Maple have fallen leaving a red carpet on the grass. I shall wait for the rest of the leaves to fall- and for some drier weather- before the boring task of sweeping them all up. So much gardening is just clearing up.
I was surprised that stanandtel thought I had included a knighted sportsman in my lists. I think they're having nightmares about the prospect of Beckham being knighted. The whole honours system is deeply suspect and rather offensive to those who are equally deserving of recognition but overlooked. Recognition in my lists will one day be considered a far greater honour than a gong. In due course there will definitely be sportsmen but there will be a serious attempt to avoid those that think they are celebrities. A view was also expressed that there was a 'fat' chance that Bob would lose weight with the diet of foods mentioned so far, particularly the rice pudding. I must stress that the whole idea of this diet is that it should be a totally painless way of losing weight and it must not intrude on my social activities.
Today's intake has been a rather healthy sounding mixture of fish and beef stew with a few secret ingredients with some cheese and salami. Unfortunately the weather has been too unpleasant to do anything on the allotment. The sleeper awoke for long enough to have a game of squash but in spite of his youth and general fitness he wasn't tough enough to go to the allotment. He was thirsty enough however during and after Wales victory over Canada on Friday and I was reluctantly drawn into drinking more than was strictly necessary to quench my thirst. Last night the Food Police again forced me to repeat that indiscretion so I'm not too optimistic about major weight loss this week.
Now for those of you who don't like lists I offer:-
21. Blackadder (4th. series)
22. Blondie
23. Brown Eyed Girl (Morrison)
24. Blue Train (Coltrane)
25. Gray's Elegy Written in a Country Churchyard
26. Greene's 'Entertainments'
27. Clockwork Orange
28. Pink
29. Red Dwarf
30. Whiter Shade of Pale
The leaves that remain on the trees are particularly colourful at the moment but all the leaves from the Japanese Maple have fallen leaving a red carpet on the grass. I shall wait for the rest of the leaves to fall- and for some drier weather- before the boring task of sweeping them all up. So much gardening is just clearing up.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Spamless
November 16th. 21.19
I think the meat in the fridge was a big mistake. I now find I am eating more than is comfortable which is absurd. I think this partly comes from the idea which is deeply ingrained that it is bad to waste food. Another deeply ingrained problem that I have only recently overcome, is that it is wrong to take taxis- one should either take a bus or tube or walk. Anyway I have lost about half a kilogramme which isn't too bad. In spite of all the weight loss I have reported, my weight doesn't really seem to have significantly altered for several weeks now so it is just possible that I have been fooling myself by forgetting the previous figure. I am however confident that my new system, which will obviously remain a secret for the time being, will lead to major weight loss.
Bad weather and excessive work have prevented any digging this week. If it stops raining for long enough tomorrow, I will finish preparing the area for the promised horse manure and will then be able to prepare the trenches for the raspberries. My sleeping partner has bought a lot of garlic and thinks he will be planting it this weekend. Hmm! We shall see.
Today's list :-
11. Iguacu Falls
12. Sherlock Holmes
13. Portnoy's Complaint
14. The Road to Endor
15. Green Wing
16. Cary Grant
17. Kim Novak
18. The Third Man
19. Raymond Chandler
20. Breakfast at the House of Jams, Lencois
I have thought that that I should balance this list each day with some pet hates but I realise that although I may whinge about things when confronted with them, I dont want to go out of my way to get irritated. Today the headline in one section of the Guardian was 'Six Steps to stopping spam'. Unfortunately I couldn't understand what to do so blogspam will probably still crop up from time to time.
I think the meat in the fridge was a big mistake. I now find I am eating more than is comfortable which is absurd. I think this partly comes from the idea which is deeply ingrained that it is bad to waste food. Another deeply ingrained problem that I have only recently overcome, is that it is wrong to take taxis- one should either take a bus or tube or walk. Anyway I have lost about half a kilogramme which isn't too bad. In spite of all the weight loss I have reported, my weight doesn't really seem to have significantly altered for several weeks now so it is just possible that I have been fooling myself by forgetting the previous figure. I am however confident that my new system, which will obviously remain a secret for the time being, will lead to major weight loss.
Bad weather and excessive work have prevented any digging this week. If it stops raining for long enough tomorrow, I will finish preparing the area for the promised horse manure and will then be able to prepare the trenches for the raspberries. My sleeping partner has bought a lot of garlic and thinks he will be planting it this weekend. Hmm! We shall see.
Today's list :-
11. Iguacu Falls
12. Sherlock Holmes
13. Portnoy's Complaint
14. The Road to Endor
15. Green Wing
16. Cary Grant
17. Kim Novak
18. The Third Man
19. Raymond Chandler
20. Breakfast at the House of Jams, Lencois
I have thought that that I should balance this list each day with some pet hates but I realise that although I may whinge about things when confronted with them, I dont want to go out of my way to get irritated. Today the headline in one section of the Guardian was 'Six Steps to stopping spam'. Unfortunately I couldn't understand what to do so blogspam will probably still crop up from time to time.
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
November 15th. 21.50
I think you should say more than 'Hi' if you read the blog and were more or less invited to make some some sort of confession or declaration. Of course this doesn't implicate Cory Edwards. The plot thickens. Eggs come from chickens. Which have no legs under 'em. What a conundrum.
I'm obviously cracking up and I don't think I am being helped by the latest piece of Euro Crime that I'm reading, the much lauded 'Fairy Gunmother'. Its a rather disjointed oddity which so far is proving more of a struggle than a pleasure. No food has yet been consumed and I'm beginning to think that it will remain food free. I forgot to weigh myself today but will try to find the right scales tomorrow.
Although I am of course a grumpy old man, I have decided to be more positive and mention in each blog a number of things,( events, places or people) of which I greatly approve or admire. I don't plan to explain why but should anyone dare to disapprove, I am prepared to defend my choice. There will be ten each day. So, in a very random order, I offer:-
1. Trilobite by Richard Fortey
2. Dr. Bronowski
3. Damon Runyon
4. The London Eye
5. The Wages of Fear
6. Trooping the Colour
7. Steve McQueen
8. Another Place (Gormley)
9. Victory (Conrad)
10. The Grand Canyon
On Poppy day the small 'g' in Google was filled in with red poppies. How easy is it for them to do that? Is Poppyday remembered in the USA as it is here? Would the Google logo have looked different on that day in different countries? Perhaps Cory Edwards could tell us what happens in the States.
I think you should say more than 'Hi' if you read the blog and were more or less invited to make some some sort of confession or declaration. Of course this doesn't implicate Cory Edwards. The plot thickens. Eggs come from chickens. Which have no legs under 'em. What a conundrum.
I'm obviously cracking up and I don't think I am being helped by the latest piece of Euro Crime that I'm reading, the much lauded 'Fairy Gunmother'. Its a rather disjointed oddity which so far is proving more of a struggle than a pleasure. No food has yet been consumed and I'm beginning to think that it will remain food free. I forgot to weigh myself today but will try to find the right scales tomorrow.
Although I am of course a grumpy old man, I have decided to be more positive and mention in each blog a number of things,( events, places or people) of which I greatly approve or admire. I don't plan to explain why but should anyone dare to disapprove, I am prepared to defend my choice. There will be ten each day. So, in a very random order, I offer:-
1. Trilobite by Richard Fortey
2. Dr. Bronowski
3. Damon Runyon
4. The London Eye
5. The Wages of Fear
6. Trooping the Colour
7. Steve McQueen
8. Another Place (Gormley)
9. Victory (Conrad)
10. The Grand Canyon
On Poppy day the small 'g' in Google was filled in with red poppies. How easy is it for them to do that? Is Poppyday remembered in the USA as it is here? Would the Google logo have looked different on that day in different countries? Perhaps Cory Edwards could tell us what happens in the States.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Subjunctive
November 14th. 22.28
How pleased I am to hear from stanandtel. I'm too innocent to have suspected that Cory Edwards might be 'askintoo'. Cory Edwards seems a reasonable chap in his blog and not in any way commercial whereas I can't say the same for askintoo. Why either of them, assuming they are different, should have read my blog is a mystery. Cory doesn't look as though he needs to lose weight and I don't think my blog's title would attract someone trying to make money. For the time being, I will give Cory the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps he will return and let us know.
I presume you meant lest not let. If so, its nice to know that others can make typing errors. If not, I apologise. Lest provides one of those contexts that demands the subjunctive, which is a dirty word in this part of the country. I don't think I have ever noticed it being used round here. Nor for that matter do we hear 'lest' except once each year at the festival of remembrance on Nov.11th. I saw tins of spam today, having gone out of my way to search the tinned meat section of Tesco's, but I couldn't bring myself to buy any. I believe that dried eggs are still used told that scrambled eggs in NHS hospitals was made from them. This may not be true but of course if it is, you have to wonder why?
Every day new parcels arrive from all over Britain (and even from Chicago, arriving before the package from Clapham), bringing me my latest order of crime fiction. I'm still struggling with the tiresome Kinsey. She had one meal she described as 'the most sensual I have ever experienced' which consisted of fresh tender bread with a crust of flaky layers, spread with buttery pate, Boston lettuce with a delicate vinaigrette, sand dabs sauteed in butter and served with succulent green grapes. Crikey! She'd have been better off with the spam fritters. She ate the meal with one of the chief suspects with whom she's also sleeping now and again. Not very professional in my opinionand furthermore she should be solving crimes not sleeping and feeding. I plan to finish it as soon as this entry is finished and I wont be returning to her for some time. Incidentally, no Hungarian delicacies have yet appeared. Someone should warn her that even lettuce can be dangerous.
Wednesday is weigh day. Its been too wet for digging and my squash partner sleeps on. I'm battling with the meat mound in the fridge so I don't expect too much weight loss tomorrow.
How pleased I am to hear from stanandtel. I'm too innocent to have suspected that Cory Edwards might be 'askintoo'. Cory Edwards seems a reasonable chap in his blog and not in any way commercial whereas I can't say the same for askintoo. Why either of them, assuming they are different, should have read my blog is a mystery. Cory doesn't look as though he needs to lose weight and I don't think my blog's title would attract someone trying to make money. For the time being, I will give Cory the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps he will return and let us know.
I presume you meant lest not let. If so, its nice to know that others can make typing errors. If not, I apologise. Lest provides one of those contexts that demands the subjunctive, which is a dirty word in this part of the country. I don't think I have ever noticed it being used round here. Nor for that matter do we hear 'lest' except once each year at the festival of remembrance on Nov.11th. I saw tins of spam today, having gone out of my way to search the tinned meat section of Tesco's, but I couldn't bring myself to buy any. I believe that dried eggs are still used told that scrambled eggs in NHS hospitals was made from them. This may not be true but of course if it is, you have to wonder why?
Every day new parcels arrive from all over Britain (and even from Chicago, arriving before the package from Clapham), bringing me my latest order of crime fiction. I'm still struggling with the tiresome Kinsey. She had one meal she described as 'the most sensual I have ever experienced' which consisted of fresh tender bread with a crust of flaky layers, spread with buttery pate, Boston lettuce with a delicate vinaigrette, sand dabs sauteed in butter and served with succulent green grapes. Crikey! She'd have been better off with the spam fritters. She ate the meal with one of the chief suspects with whom she's also sleeping now and again. Not very professional in my opinionand furthermore she should be solving crimes not sleeping and feeding. I plan to finish it as soon as this entry is finished and I wont be returning to her for some time. Incidentally, no Hungarian delicacies have yet appeared. Someone should warn her that even lettuce can be dangerous.
Wednesday is weigh day. Its been too wet for digging and my squash partner sleeps on. I'm battling with the meat mound in the fridge so I don't expect too much weight loss tomorrow.
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Spam
November 12th. 21.13
Having been on call this weekend I definitely feel thinner. Still no bread in the house, I shall be mainly eating protein and yogurts for the next few days. I find that I have filled the fridge with lamb chops, beef steaks, cod, parma ham and cheese. It all looked so good when I went shopping but I'm not sure I can eat it all before it goes off- unless I start having chops for breakfast!
There is a comment from Cory Edwards whose blog, Cory's Curiosities, I have read. He includes a photo which may be easy enough but is obviously beyond me and a lot of biographical details. I suppose anyone could guess who I am, where I live and what I do, though of course most readers are well known to me, but I prefer to keep it anonymous. Since in theory it is about me losing weight, I'm not at all sure why Cory Edwards would look at this blog, but I thank him for his message. I suppose 'askintoo' is just a sort of blogspam and has probably written the same publicity remarks on countless other blogs, though why he hit mine or Cory's is a mystery. I would have thought that the non-commercial and amateurish tone would be apparent. I agree it should be discouraged though the death penalty seems a bit harsh.
When I was a schoolchild, Spam was quite popular. I have memories of eating it with mashed potatoes and potentially dangerous lettuce. It then seemed to disappear for years , only to reappear in the Monty Python sketch. I'm not even sure if it could be bought in ordinary shops in those intervening years. Then I saw a can of it in a local supermarket, possibly fifteen years ago and bought it for nostalgic reasons rather than hunger. It was awful and very salty. Strangely I haven't seen it since though I haven't been looking for it. I don't go to the tinned meat section- is there one? So why is computer spam so called?
A further brief note on rice pudding in the 'biscuit' form. A few years ago I thought I would cook a rice pudding in the lower Aga oven while I went out so I could eat it on my return at closing time. I completely forgot it but was woken by the smell of something cooking at about four in the morning. It was by then quite solid, slightly crisp at the edges but not burnt- absolutely delicious- a perfect 4am snicky snack!
I haven't heard the score, so I dont know how much I'm going to enjoy the big match on Match of the Day in a few minutes. Did Arsenal win earlier today?Can I get a ticket watch them in the Emirates stadium this season? You would think that it would be easy but its really not.
Having been on call this weekend I definitely feel thinner. Still no bread in the house, I shall be mainly eating protein and yogurts for the next few days. I find that I have filled the fridge with lamb chops, beef steaks, cod, parma ham and cheese. It all looked so good when I went shopping but I'm not sure I can eat it all before it goes off- unless I start having chops for breakfast!
There is a comment from Cory Edwards whose blog, Cory's Curiosities, I have read. He includes a photo which may be easy enough but is obviously beyond me and a lot of biographical details. I suppose anyone could guess who I am, where I live and what I do, though of course most readers are well known to me, but I prefer to keep it anonymous. Since in theory it is about me losing weight, I'm not at all sure why Cory Edwards would look at this blog, but I thank him for his message. I suppose 'askintoo' is just a sort of blogspam and has probably written the same publicity remarks on countless other blogs, though why he hit mine or Cory's is a mystery. I would have thought that the non-commercial and amateurish tone would be apparent. I agree it should be discouraged though the death penalty seems a bit harsh.
When I was a schoolchild, Spam was quite popular. I have memories of eating it with mashed potatoes and potentially dangerous lettuce. It then seemed to disappear for years , only to reappear in the Monty Python sketch. I'm not even sure if it could be bought in ordinary shops in those intervening years. Then I saw a can of it in a local supermarket, possibly fifteen years ago and bought it for nostalgic reasons rather than hunger. It was awful and very salty. Strangely I haven't seen it since though I haven't been looking for it. I don't go to the tinned meat section- is there one? So why is computer spam so called?
A further brief note on rice pudding in the 'biscuit' form. A few years ago I thought I would cook a rice pudding in the lower Aga oven while I went out so I could eat it on my return at closing time. I completely forgot it but was woken by the smell of something cooking at about four in the morning. It was by then quite solid, slightly crisp at the edges but not burnt- absolutely delicious- a perfect 4am snicky snack!
I haven't heard the score, so I dont know how much I'm going to enjoy the big match on Match of the Day in a few minutes. Did Arsenal win earlier today?Can I get a ticket watch them in the Emirates stadium this season? You would think that it would be easy but its really not.
Saturday, November 11, 2006
Rice pudding
November 11th. 10pm
Its quite likely that the Ritz is as good or as bad as any other fish and chip shop/bar but it is equally likely that one's judgement may get a bit clouded by alcohol. Others who may be no more sober feel that Opels is the best though Bristolians favour an un-named Bristol restaurant. Furthermore if the fish and chips has to be doused in vinegar and/or ketchup in order to make it edible.....etc etc. I rest my case. Thank goodness I was sober- practically teetotal to look after you all! I don't recall anyone declining rice pud even when it was slightly overcooked.
The problem with cooking rice puddings is easily overcome if you decide in advance whether you feel that the rice is the reason for cooking it or whether you really dont care as long there is perfect skin! I freely admit that to me the rice is irrelevant and have considered omitting it completely. For kevandjules here is my recipe:-
Sprinkle a few rice grains (slightly less than two dessert spoons) into a Pyrex dish. Sprinkle a bit of sugar over the rice. Pour in about one and a quarter pints of milk and then about half a pint of double cream. Throw in four bits of salted butter (Lurpak) and put on the bottom shelf of the top oven of your Aga without any lid on it for approximately an hour and a half. Peek at it now and again after an hour and a quarter to check that the skin isn't getting overdone and remove when the skin looks just right. Do all this preferably without Mike or tubby Williams in the house as they end up fighting over who has had the biggest helping and who will scrape the bowl. If you don't have an Aga start saving now but not with Farepak.
I find it very odd actually that anyone should want to save with Farepak. Why not just put your money in a post office savings account? Or if they don't trust the post office, in a piggy bank under the bed?
Someone (askinstoo) has made a rather fundamental error in logging on to this blog in the forlorn hope of making some money. Well, thanks for the tip, but this blog wont lead anyone to riches. I just made one of those strange errors in which I wrote Monet, not money. Perhaps there is a clue there after all for askinstoo! Are you any good at forgery? or cookery?
Its quite likely that the Ritz is as good or as bad as any other fish and chip shop/bar but it is equally likely that one's judgement may get a bit clouded by alcohol. Others who may be no more sober feel that Opels is the best though Bristolians favour an un-named Bristol restaurant. Furthermore if the fish and chips has to be doused in vinegar and/or ketchup in order to make it edible.....etc etc. I rest my case. Thank goodness I was sober- practically teetotal to look after you all! I don't recall anyone declining rice pud even when it was slightly overcooked.
The problem with cooking rice puddings is easily overcome if you decide in advance whether you feel that the rice is the reason for cooking it or whether you really dont care as long there is perfect skin! I freely admit that to me the rice is irrelevant and have considered omitting it completely. For kevandjules here is my recipe:-
Sprinkle a few rice grains (slightly less than two dessert spoons) into a Pyrex dish. Sprinkle a bit of sugar over the rice. Pour in about one and a quarter pints of milk and then about half a pint of double cream. Throw in four bits of salted butter (Lurpak) and put on the bottom shelf of the top oven of your Aga without any lid on it for approximately an hour and a half. Peek at it now and again after an hour and a quarter to check that the skin isn't getting overdone and remove when the skin looks just right. Do all this preferably without Mike or tubby Williams in the house as they end up fighting over who has had the biggest helping and who will scrape the bowl. If you don't have an Aga start saving now but not with Farepak.
I find it very odd actually that anyone should want to save with Farepak. Why not just put your money in a post office savings account? Or if they don't trust the post office, in a piggy bank under the bed?
Someone (askinstoo) has made a rather fundamental error in logging on to this blog in the forlorn hope of making some money. Well, thanks for the tip, but this blog wont lead anyone to riches. I just made one of those strange errors in which I wrote Monet, not money. Perhaps there is a clue there after all for askinstoo! Are you any good at forgery? or cookery?
Friday, November 10, 2006
Dangerous vegetables
November 10th. 11pm
I put the time at the top because, as you can see from the last blog, the time I write is completely different from the 'official ' time which might be standard eastern time.
Why did the colours of the Google letters change the other day? I am sure that the usual colours had gone and the letters were filled with bits of the union jack. When I mentioned this to someone and checked it the next day, they had reverted to normal. I should have made a print. I did not imagine this. The normal colours of the Google letters was a question on University Challenge a few weeks ago.
The obituary columns of the Guardian are one of the first things I read when I get the paper. I'm not sure if this is healthy of me or whether perhaps I shouldn't admit it. Its a bit like going to re-unions- not that I ever have ( I don't seem to get invited and I know I'm not the only survivor). I think I might go if invited, just to see how people look now, compare notes on how many stents or grafts or how many new joints have been inserted. But of course nowadays the obituaries are much more likely to be of those who have played a part in one's life. I have no idea who most of them are but its amazing how much some of them have packed into their life and I actually find them rather inspirational. Last year the death of Saul Bellow drove me to begin re-reading his novels after reading his obituary made me feel that I had not got as much from his novels as I should have when I was younger.( Apart from Augie March, this proved wrong.) Recently the death of Eric Newby was reported and although the reviews were rather critical of his later work, I never had anything but pleasure from reading his stuff. My favourite was 'The Last Grain Race'. One of my favourite sportsmen during my lifetime was Don Thompson who died on October 4th. He was a true amateur who won an Olympic gold medal for that very wierd looking event, the fifty kilometres walk. He trained for the race in his bathroom with various steam kettles to simulate the conditions he would encounter in Rome!
KevandJules suggest I should stick with Kinsey Millhone because there are going to be some exciting Hungarian snicky snacks coming up. I hope they come up soon. There isn't, so far, any tension or excitement but a rather dreary succession of interviews with potential witnesses . One of the witnesses has just been murdered as a result of Kinsey's investigation. She might have got something out of this witness had she not overslept as a result of too much bottled beer. I am guessing that one or two more will be slaughtered while Kinsey is having a Big Mac and a few more beers.
I was locked into the allotment site for the second time this week. I have decided that of all the weeds, the nettles are the most tiresome to clear out. I would discuss this with the sleepng partner if only he would waken. He is delegated to get the garlic that apparenly can or should be planted now. I read with alarm and some amusement that there is a body in the USA called the Lettuce Safety Initiative; alarm that lettuce is possibly dangerous and that we need such a body;
amusement that they are expanding to include spinach! ( NEJM Vol 355 ;19 ) Since I am on call for the weekend, I can't really do much at the allotment so I thought I would clear the perpetual spinach patch and the useless beetroots (plenty on top but nothing underneath!) at the house. I shall take additional care now that I know of its reputation. Anticipating a big weight loss this week.
I put the time at the top because, as you can see from the last blog, the time I write is completely different from the 'official ' time which might be standard eastern time.
Why did the colours of the Google letters change the other day? I am sure that the usual colours had gone and the letters were filled with bits of the union jack. When I mentioned this to someone and checked it the next day, they had reverted to normal. I should have made a print. I did not imagine this. The normal colours of the Google letters was a question on University Challenge a few weeks ago.
The obituary columns of the Guardian are one of the first things I read when I get the paper. I'm not sure if this is healthy of me or whether perhaps I shouldn't admit it. Its a bit like going to re-unions- not that I ever have ( I don't seem to get invited and I know I'm not the only survivor). I think I might go if invited, just to see how people look now, compare notes on how many stents or grafts or how many new joints have been inserted. But of course nowadays the obituaries are much more likely to be of those who have played a part in one's life. I have no idea who most of them are but its amazing how much some of them have packed into their life and I actually find them rather inspirational. Last year the death of Saul Bellow drove me to begin re-reading his novels after reading his obituary made me feel that I had not got as much from his novels as I should have when I was younger.( Apart from Augie March, this proved wrong.) Recently the death of Eric Newby was reported and although the reviews were rather critical of his later work, I never had anything but pleasure from reading his stuff. My favourite was 'The Last Grain Race'. One of my favourite sportsmen during my lifetime was Don Thompson who died on October 4th. He was a true amateur who won an Olympic gold medal for that very wierd looking event, the fifty kilometres walk. He trained for the race in his bathroom with various steam kettles to simulate the conditions he would encounter in Rome!
KevandJules suggest I should stick with Kinsey Millhone because there are going to be some exciting Hungarian snicky snacks coming up. I hope they come up soon. There isn't, so far, any tension or excitement but a rather dreary succession of interviews with potential witnesses . One of the witnesses has just been murdered as a result of Kinsey's investigation. She might have got something out of this witness had she not overslept as a result of too much bottled beer. I am guessing that one or two more will be slaughtered while Kinsey is having a Big Mac and a few more beers.
I was locked into the allotment site for the second time this week. I have decided that of all the weeds, the nettles are the most tiresome to clear out. I would discuss this with the sleepng partner if only he would waken. He is delegated to get the garlic that apparenly can or should be planted now. I read with alarm and some amusement that there is a body in the USA called the Lettuce Safety Initiative; alarm that lettuce is possibly dangerous and that we need such a body;
amusement that they are expanding to include spinach! ( NEJM Vol 355 ;19 ) Since I am on call for the weekend, I can't really do much at the allotment so I thought I would clear the perpetual spinach patch and the useless beetroots (plenty on top but nothing underneath!) at the house. I shall take additional care now that I know of its reputation. Anticipating a big weight loss this week.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Choice Cuts
November 10th. 2 am.
Of the following six, which is the odd one out, Glen Ample, Ben Lomond, Tulameen, Glen Moy, Ashmead's Kernel or Autumn Bliss?
I haven't published a blog for a long time and cannot really explain the reasons. I suppose it is partly due to the fact that I haven't come across an eating detective ( or lawyer ) recently. In an attempt to be fair to women, which of course I always am, I am struggling through the first of a long series of the Sue Grafton 'novels' featuring private detective Kinsey Millhone. She eats a lot of meals in diners, scrambled eggs with rye bread and endless cups of coffee and also quite a lot of bottled beer, so I have a low expectation of a quick solution to the crime she is investigating. It also made me have one of those endless dreams that keep coming back uninvited where you know you're dreaming but just cannot re-set the scene and get into a different dream. I can't see me reading many more of them.
I also struggled with Lucarelli's 'Almost Blue' which was not an easy read. You never really get to know any of the characters and can't build up any sympathy with any of them. The female detective is too young and is obviously distracted by sex rather than alcohol so she almost fouls up the case in an almost fatal way. She should stick to food in future.
I hinted at a lawyer earlier beacause the hero of Gianrico Carofiglio's 'Involuntary Witness ' is a lawyer and its a really good read. I'm looking forward to 'A Walk in the Dark' which I have ready and waiting as soon as Kinsey Millhone has finished drinking her way round California. The lawyer, Guido Guerrieri, does have a few meals but no great detail is given and unlike some of the other detectives from Italy I mentioned before, you don't feel you want to try various dishes as you read the book. I also have another Padura waiting from the last Amazon delivery but someone told me recently that Cuban food was nothing to write home about.
I mention Choice Cuts because this week I have been mostly eating cold roast beef and I have decided that although its nice once, it becomes too monotonous after three days. The problem arises because drunken guests turned down the offer of hot roast beef followed by the best rice pudding in the world in favour of fish and chips in order to demonstrate to an american friend what typical Brits often eat. I don't think he was impressed any more than I was and would have been far better served by my cooking. Furthermore, the return of the beer and fish and chip diet is not really part of my plans. Of course I then had to struggle on my own with a large joint and had to use the already purchased cream in a large rice pudding which I managed to eat in one sitting. For those of you who have tasted this dish at my house, you will like to know that it was one of my best. Now I come to think of it, I made another rice pudding last week which was so good that I almost missed Frank Lampard's goal against Barcelona!
I don't expect many will recognise 'Choice Cuts' but it is the title of a thriller by Boileau and Narcejac written in 1965. On the cover, the blurb says this book has a 'fiendish climax of surpassing horror'! They were also responsible for several others including ' Celle Qui N'Etait Plus' which was made into a brilliant, probably black and white film, which might have been called 'The Devils' ( Les Diaboliques ) but I'm sure someone can correct me. It was an era of great films such as'Jules and Jim' and 'Last Days of Marienbad' which of course spawned a generation of nim players. I think I shall re-read the Boileau and Narcejac books and being French they should have some decent detectives who eat proper meals. I am also planning to re-visit Freeling's Castang. I have absolutely no memory of those books or what he ate except that I enjoyed them.
So it will come as no surprise that there has been no change in the weight during the past few weeks. With only about eight weeks to go before the end of the first half year of this diet. I feel that I would like to achieve a bit more so I feel that more intensive allotment digging is called for. My sleeping partner appeared very briefly about a week ago but I feel that he has now gone into hibernation. We have done possibly a third of the plot so far. There are two plants that have mysteriously appeared which I think are probably vines rather than thornless blackberry as I had thought earlier. They are not necessarily what I want but one doesn't want to upset the Sicilian/Italian community. I have actually planted something myself; Japanese Onions. Perhaps I'll be glad but I'm not sure if I even know what they're like.
The original question was a trick question. Ashmead's Kernel is a variety of apple and Ben Lomond is a blackcurrant; the others are all raspberries. They will soon be arriving. The apple will probably stay at the house because there are other suitable pollinators there but the rest are for the allotment. When my sleeping partner awakes in the spring it will look quite different- and so will I!
Of the following six, which is the odd one out, Glen Ample, Ben Lomond, Tulameen, Glen Moy, Ashmead's Kernel or Autumn Bliss?
I haven't published a blog for a long time and cannot really explain the reasons. I suppose it is partly due to the fact that I haven't come across an eating detective ( or lawyer ) recently. In an attempt to be fair to women, which of course I always am, I am struggling through the first of a long series of the Sue Grafton 'novels' featuring private detective Kinsey Millhone. She eats a lot of meals in diners, scrambled eggs with rye bread and endless cups of coffee and also quite a lot of bottled beer, so I have a low expectation of a quick solution to the crime she is investigating. It also made me have one of those endless dreams that keep coming back uninvited where you know you're dreaming but just cannot re-set the scene and get into a different dream. I can't see me reading many more of them.
I also struggled with Lucarelli's 'Almost Blue' which was not an easy read. You never really get to know any of the characters and can't build up any sympathy with any of them. The female detective is too young and is obviously distracted by sex rather than alcohol so she almost fouls up the case in an almost fatal way. She should stick to food in future.
I hinted at a lawyer earlier beacause the hero of Gianrico Carofiglio's 'Involuntary Witness ' is a lawyer and its a really good read. I'm looking forward to 'A Walk in the Dark' which I have ready and waiting as soon as Kinsey Millhone has finished drinking her way round California. The lawyer, Guido Guerrieri, does have a few meals but no great detail is given and unlike some of the other detectives from Italy I mentioned before, you don't feel you want to try various dishes as you read the book. I also have another Padura waiting from the last Amazon delivery but someone told me recently that Cuban food was nothing to write home about.
I mention Choice Cuts because this week I have been mostly eating cold roast beef and I have decided that although its nice once, it becomes too monotonous after three days. The problem arises because drunken guests turned down the offer of hot roast beef followed by the best rice pudding in the world in favour of fish and chips in order to demonstrate to an american friend what typical Brits often eat. I don't think he was impressed any more than I was and would have been far better served by my cooking. Furthermore, the return of the beer and fish and chip diet is not really part of my plans. Of course I then had to struggle on my own with a large joint and had to use the already purchased cream in a large rice pudding which I managed to eat in one sitting. For those of you who have tasted this dish at my house, you will like to know that it was one of my best. Now I come to think of it, I made another rice pudding last week which was so good that I almost missed Frank Lampard's goal against Barcelona!
I don't expect many will recognise 'Choice Cuts' but it is the title of a thriller by Boileau and Narcejac written in 1965. On the cover, the blurb says this book has a 'fiendish climax of surpassing horror'! They were also responsible for several others including ' Celle Qui N'Etait Plus' which was made into a brilliant, probably black and white film, which might have been called 'The Devils' ( Les Diaboliques ) but I'm sure someone can correct me. It was an era of great films such as'Jules and Jim' and 'Last Days of Marienbad' which of course spawned a generation of nim players. I think I shall re-read the Boileau and Narcejac books and being French they should have some decent detectives who eat proper meals. I am also planning to re-visit Freeling's Castang. I have absolutely no memory of those books or what he ate except that I enjoyed them.
So it will come as no surprise that there has been no change in the weight during the past few weeks. With only about eight weeks to go before the end of the first half year of this diet. I feel that I would like to achieve a bit more so I feel that more intensive allotment digging is called for. My sleeping partner appeared very briefly about a week ago but I feel that he has now gone into hibernation. We have done possibly a third of the plot so far. There are two plants that have mysteriously appeared which I think are probably vines rather than thornless blackberry as I had thought earlier. They are not necessarily what I want but one doesn't want to upset the Sicilian/Italian community. I have actually planted something myself; Japanese Onions. Perhaps I'll be glad but I'm not sure if I even know what they're like.
The original question was a trick question. Ashmead's Kernel is a variety of apple and Ben Lomond is a blackcurrant; the others are all raspberries. They will soon be arriving. The apple will probably stay at the house because there are other suitable pollinators there but the rest are for the allotment. When my sleeping partner awakes in the spring it will look quite different- and so will I!
